It’s Valentine’s Day, and you probably have your Valentine’s Day card ready to go and are looking for some funny Valentine’s Day jokes to make your other half laugh out loud. Well, you came to the right place. The following 66 one-line jokes are some of the best Valentine’s jokes! Enjoy and use them sparingly.
Here’s a list of 66 Valentine’s Day jokes sure to bring a smile to all your funny Valentines:
- What did one volcano say to the other? “I lava you!”
- Why do skunks love Valentine’s Day? Because they’re scent-imental creatures!
- What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day? “I’m stuck on you!”
- How did the phone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.
- What do farmers give their wives on Valentine’s Day? Hogs and kisses!
- Why did the banana go out with the prune? Because it couldn’t find a date.
- Why did the boy put candy under his pillow? Because he wanted sweet dreams!
- What did the paper clip say to the magnet? “I find you very attractive.”
- Why did the lion break up with his girlfriend? Because she was a cheetah!
- What did the light bulb say to the switch? “You turn me on.”
- What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts!
- Why did the drum take his girlfriend to the music? Because he couldn’t beat her.
- What do you call a very small valentine? A valentiny!
- What did the boy owl say to the girl owl on Valentine’s Day? “Owl be yours!”
- What did one sheep say to the other? “I love ewe!”
- What did the painter say to his girlfriend? “I love you with all my art.”
- Why did the ghost go to the party alone? Because he had no body to go with him!
- What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? “I’m sweet on you.”
- What did the calculator say to the pencil? “You can count on me.”
- Why do squirrels love Valentine’s Day? Because they’re nuts about it!
- What did the cat say on Valentine’s Day? “You’re purr-fect for me.”
- What did the bat say to his girlfriend? “You’re fun to hang around with.”
- Why don’t oysters share their pearls? Because they’re shellfish lovers!
- What do you call a ghost’s true love? His ghoul-friend.
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired of being alone!
- What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? “Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?”
- What did one bee say to the other? “I love bee-ing with you!”
- Why was the broom late? It over-swept!
- What do you write in a slug’s Valentine’s Day card? “Be my Valen-slime!”
- How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend? “He gave her a ring.”
- What did the French chef give his wife for Valentine’s Day? “A hug and a quiche!”
- Why did the girl put candy under her pillow? “Because she wanted sweet dreams.”
- What did one watermelon say to the other? “You’re one in a melon!”
- Why did the boy put clothes on the Valentine’s chocolates? “He heard they were choco-late.”
- What kind of flowers do you never give on Valentine’s Day? Cauliflowers!
- What did the boy bird say to the girl bird? “Let me call you Tweet-heart!”
- What did the elephant say to his girlfriend? “I love you a ton!”
- Why did the man put his money in the blender? “Because he wanted to make liquid assets.”
- What did the magnet say to the steel? “I find you very attractive.”
- What do you call a ghost’s true love? “His ghoul-friend.”
- What did the rabbit say to his girlfriend? “Somebunny loves you!”
- What did the pencil say to the paper? “I dot my i’s on you!”
- Why did the banana go out with the prune? “Because he couldn’t find a date.”
- What did the boy pickle say to the girl pickle? “You mean a great dill to me.”
- What did one oar say to the other? “Can I interest you in a little row-mance?”
- What do you call two birds in love? “Tweet-hearts.”
- Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy? “It was Valenswine’s Day!”
- What did the boy sheep say to the girl sheep? “Will you be my Valen-ewe?”
- What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day? “I’m stuck on you.”
- What did the boy owl say to the girl owl on Valentine’s Day? “Owl be yours!”
- Why do skunks love Valentine’s Day? “Because they’re very scent-imental.”
- What did one light bulb say to the other? “I love you a watt!”
- What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream? “I’m sweet on you.”
- Why was the broom so lovable? “Because it swept her off her feet.”
- What did the farmer give his wife on Valentine’s Day? “Hogs and kisses.”
- What did the bat say to his girlfriend? “You’re fun to hang around with.”
- What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus? “I want to hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand.”
- Why did the boy put candy under his pillow? “Because he wanted sweet dreams.”
- What did the gingerbread man put on his bed? “A cookie sheet!”
- How did the phone propose to his girlfriend? “He gave her a ring.”
- Why did the bicycle fall over? “Because it was two-tired.”
- What do you call a very small valentine? “A valentiny.”
- What did the drum say to the other instruments on Valentine’s Day? “My heart beats for you.”
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? “They don’t have the guts.”
- What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on Valentine’s Day? “You’re purr-fect for me.”
- What did the cucumber say to the pickle? “You mean a great dill to me.”
Yes, I know these are cheesy, but I guarantee these Valentine’s Day jokes made you laugh out loud at least once. They certainly did with me. Be sure to share with your partner. And if you’re struggling to find Valentine’s Day wishes, read this post.